The Redneck Sex Test

All answers are true or false.

1. The clitoris is a type of flower.
2. A pubic hair is a wild rabbit.
3. Spread Eagle is an extinct bird.
4. Vagina is a medical term used to describe a Heart Attack.
5. A menstrual cycle has three wheels.
6. A G-string is part of a fiddle.
7. Semen is a term for sailors.
8. Anus is a Latin term for yearly.
9. Testicles are found on an Octopus.
10. Asphalt describes rectal problems.
11. KOTEX is a radio station in Cincinnati.
12. Masturbate is used to catch large fish.
13. Coitus is a musical instrument.
14. Fetus is a character on Gunsmoke.
15. An umbilical chord is part of a parachute.
16. A condom is a large apartment complex.
17. An orgasm is a person who accompanies a church choir.
18. A diaphragm is a drawing in geometry.
19. A dildo is a variety of sweet pickle.
20. An erection is when Japanese people vote.
21. A lesbian is a person from the Middle East.
22. Sodomy is a special land of fast growing grass.
23. Pornography is the business of making records.
24. Genitals are people of non-Jewish origin.
25. Douche is the French word for "twelve".

Paul, if Bill Maher is a dweeb what does that make you? A dweep? A dwerb? LOL Okay, so he is a comedian, but he is a damn good one picking on the right things. He is clearly intelligent, reads a lot, and has a good grasp and view of this world. Not to mention quick witted and deep in his own way. He must spend a lot of time at that and put a lot of effort in it. And his guests are very interesting also, including the musicians he has on his program that are a cut above average it seems. Just saying. If you don’t like Maher, who do you like?

I liked what he said about Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Whitney Houston and ding bats like that. And those are the kind of women available to me and that is why I don’t have a woman. They are older women and have calmed down a bit but not much, they still have a lot of stupid ideas and attitudes. ‘Crazy’ isn’t one of them, she is in a different category, I think that she must just have issues with men in general because of earlier experiences but she has never shared what they where with me so we can discuss them to see if we can resolve them.

Mexico has announced that Mexico will not participate in the next Summer Olympics. "Anyone who can run, jump, or swim has already left the country."

A good piece of chocolate has about 200 calories. As I enjoy two servings per night and a few more on weekends, I consume 3,500 calories of chocolate in a week, which equals to one pound of weight per week.

Therefore, in the last three and a half years, I have had a chocolate caloric intake of about 180 pounds. I only weigh 155 pounds, so without chocolate, I would have wasted away to nothing about three months ago. I owe my life to chocolate!

Hey, have a great day, hugs…. BBC