Friday, May 02, 2008

Done [Updated]


For newer posts check the link.
SPIRITS DOINGS

I seldom look at this blog anymore, visit my Doings for the current posts, lots of interesting old posts here if you wish to go through them though.

Except for updates on projects and camping trips spirit is done blogging, after two years I see that its just been a big waste of time that took up many of my hours. A blog has not served spirits intended purpose. And spirit gets tired of repeating himself because a blog does not read like a book, and the monkeys won’t listen to spirit but want to argue with him and for him to kiss their butts so that their precious little ego’s don’t get hurt.

Blogs are pretty much worthless, at least for my intent. They are for the most part just a lot of monkeys mucking around. Your turn, it’s not my battle anymore trying to tell you what you are, or to save the world, I’ll just watch it go to hell from a mountainside. Acceptance is my accepting that blogging is a big waste of my time and that the world is going to continue going to hell and there is nothing I can do about it. I want more time for myself at this point.

Any new posts on my projects and doings will be posted at my new blog. SPIRITS DOINGS

But I’ll check for new comments on this blog daily in case any of you want to love me or pitch shit on me. Spirit always loves a good pissing contest.

Avoid arguments with the Mrs. about lifting the toilet seat by simply using the sink.

Those that want empathy all the time need to get their crap together. I notice that it’s usually the screw ups that always expect it. Those that give empathy all the time are just feeding the receivers need.

I may have something heavy to say at times, but I will say it here or on the Spirit 11 blog.

You monkeys are on your own, happy paths, hugs…. BBC

Thursday, May 01, 2008

Butter/Lemon frosting

Needed some frosting, usually buy it but got into my Better Homes and Gardens cookbook and looked at frosting recipes. Wanted something fast and simple, and that didn’t require cooking, didn’t have some items called for in the various recipes so chucked it and dreamed up my own frosting. Very rich, but good, approved by Helen.

2 cups powered sugar (a guess)
1/3rd cup margarine (a guess)
Concentrated lemon juice
Vanilla (optional)

I didn't actually measure the ingredients. Blend margarine into powered sugar with a fork and start adding a bit of lemon juice at a time until you have the thickness you want. Done deal. Grated lemon or orange skins would be good in it I think.

Fixed Peggy’s door and mowed her lawn yesterday, and fixed her vacuum cleaner. Peggy should sell her home, she is getting old and can’t afford to take care of the yard anymore but wants it Martha Stewart pretty and perfect. You monkeys want everything pretty and perfect and you are still not happy, hello !!!

Spend more time talking to your mate, dance with your mate, having sex with your mate. If you don’t have a mate, well, maybe it’s because you are a pain in the butt, or any possible mates for you are, that is my experience.

I was out mowing her lawn (with my free mower that I've fixed, love the self propelled feature) when she left to a dental appointment and said to me in passing “I’m off now.” “Yes you are.” “What?” “You’re off now.” I’m guessing that she still doesn’t get it. LOL

She has a battery operated vacuum cleaner that I took apart and cleaned and replaced the battery in, it’s a joke, people are so hooked on battery operated things that they should just get over it all. Most of them are just things other monkeys dream up to sell them. My plug in vacuum will kick any battery operated vacuums butt and will last years longer and NOT need batteries that wear out and need to be properly disposed of. Often old tech is still the best tech. Come up with a lifetime battery and maybe I will change my mind.

Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother, "Little Billy showed me his wiener today." Before the mother could raise a concern, Little Sally went on to say, "It reminded me of a peanut." Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mom asked, "Really small, was it?" Little Sally replied, "No......salty!"

A father and his 6 year-old son attended a horse auction. The father decided to check out a horse prior to bidding. The father ran his hands up and down the horse's legs, face, and rump. The little boy asked, "Dad, what are you doing?" The father replied, I'm interested in buying this horse and I'm checking it out." The little boy's eyes became as big as saucers and he blurted out, "Dad, we have to go home now!" The father was puzzled and asked him, "Why do we have to go home right this minute?!" The boy replied, "Because, the UPS man was there yesterday and I think he wants to buy Mom!"

Japanese scientists have created a camera with a shutter speed so fast they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

ACCEPTANCE
Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs… BBC

Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Inspiration

Peggy called me yesterday, the inside knob on her back door fell off so I will go by and fix it today while I’m out doing the Polly’s Honky Saloon and Whorehouse laundry.

I got both sides of the material spray painted yesterday even though it was raining some at the same time the sun was shining. After it dried a bit I got it under cover to stay dry and cure some more. Got a few rain streaks in it but it got sealed pretty good and will be painted again after I put it on the camper ceiling.

The Rev. Jeremiah Wright has criticized the U.S. government as imperialist and stood by his suggestion that the United States invented the HIV virus as a means of genocide against minorities. "Based on this Tuskegee experiment and based on what has happened to Africans in this country, I believe our government is capable of doing anything," he said.

I think our government is imperialist also, just in sneaky ways is all. And I also think it is capable of doing anything it decides to take on in secret. But I think it’s far fetched to say that they introduced HIV in Africa. I don’t know much about that story but I think that its far fetched.

An older man wearing a stovepipe hat, a waistcoat and a phony beard sat down at a bar and ordered a drink. As the bartender set it down, he asked, "Going to a party?" "Yeah, a costume party," the man answered, "I'm supposed to come dressed as my love life." "But you look like Abe Lincoln." observed the barkeep. "That's right. My last four scores were seven years ago."

THIS IS A WEIRD PLANET
Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

It seemed like a good idea

I was looking in my storage units for a large piece of material when I came across a toy train transformer I had forgotten I had. I have a number of battery operated drills but only one of the batteries is still good and they are expensive. There is electricity most places I use these drills so I adapted a cord to attach to one of the drills to run it with.

It runs it but not very powerfully, the drill needs more than the ten watts the transformer puts out. But then I hooked it to the lawnmower battery and it runs it just fine, so at least I have that going for me, I’ll find a use for the transformer someday.

I like the battery operated drills because they run slower and are great for driving screws and I drive a lot of screws with what I like to call my screwing device.

This is the day the president of the local chapter of THE INSANE CHICKS SOCIETY (TICS) is supposed to return to this area. I’ll bet she doesn’t call me though, I tested her thinker too much recently when I pointed out that she didn’t see that she was lying to herself, it got her tits all knotted up. LOL

A McLean, Va., elementary school principal who banned children from playing tag said the game may soon return to the school playground. Kent Gardens Elementary School Principal Robyn Hooker said. Robyn Hooker, love the name, I wonder if she lives on Hooker Road.

I got an email from Peggy asking if I would do some weeding for her, I fix things at her place when she needs little things done. I replied with…. Hon, I don't do weeding, I'm to skilled and in demand to bother with that. And I hate weeding, I just enjoy my weeds. LOL …I'll mow the lawn though. I sure wish it would stop raining so much so that I can get more done outside. I want to get the little pickup camper I'm repairing to where I can start going to the beaches and camping more. I think that is what retirement should be about. Hugs, Bill

She shot back with “Well, Bill, I guess we BOTH hate weeding.” LOL

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Warren Buffett, the world's richest person, said on Monday the U.S. economy is in a recession that will be more severe than most people expect. DUH !!!!! Get ready to be thankful for what you have. Hey, if he is the worlds richest man why doesn’t he fix this? I will give him credit for being a good philanthropist, but hey, he made his money off of wall street, you !! It’s not his money, it’s your money. Hello !!!!

MY ALTER EGO

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Monday, April 28, 2008

Did you know?

That the EUROPEAN UNION is an example of a SECURITY COMMUNITY, in which war has become unthinkable?

Actually, I am a bit confused about that being as Tony Blair supported Mr. I’m A Stupid Motherfucker Bush in the Iraq war. I guess even security communities fail?

GET OVER ME DAN'L

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Free mower

Spotted a free lawnmower on Yahoo Freecycle, listed as not running but they didn’t want to send it to the landfill. When I went to get it I discovered that it was a very nice self-propelled model with electric start. It has some issues, needs some control cables replaced (I have some), an ignition switch and such, but the battery is good.

It also has a pull starter, I dinked with it for a few minutes and it started on the first pull, the six horse power engine is in very good shape. Not sure what I will do with it, already have a good mower here, but I’ll fix it up and sell it or pass it on through Freecycle.

Not that it matters, not with my view of the big picture. Small planet (really), 7 billion monkeys believing stupid things and doing stupid things, and there is the greedy rich and slobs to factor in. Looking into the future I see a planet in a shambles in ten years with everyone just trying to survive and being thankful for some shelter and a little food, we are on the very edge of extinction again. What do you see in the future?

Natural-gas vehicles hot in Utah, where the fuel is cheap. Troy Anderson was at the gas pump and couldn't have been happier, filling up at a rate of $5 per tank. Anderson was paying 63.8 cents per gallon equivalent for compressed natural gas, making Utah a hot market for vehicles that run on the fuel.
I expect that to change.

Well, we will still have some humor to keep us going.

A French guest, staying in a hotel called room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge. Toilette pepper!"

An Australian scientist has invented a bra which offers more support and prevents a woman's breasts from bouncing up and down. After announcing his invention, the scientist was taken outside where a large group of men beat the shit out of him.

"Paris Hilton is going to star in a new reality show where she looks for a new best friend to replace Nicole Richie. So far the front-runner to replace Nicole is a No. 2 pencil." - Conan O'Brien

I ate some crawfish yesterday, well, one, never had them before, yuck !! But got them on sale so maybe they were too old, or I cooked them wrong.

AT THE WAR PROTEST YESTERDAY
Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Procrastinate

Maybe this so called god just up and died and we are now on our own, sure looks like it to me. And I’ve never seen any sign that he, it, existed in the first place. Besides, it was the monkeys that invented time, time means nothing to the universe/cosmos. Monkeys need it to define things. What wacky weather, it’s not global warming, it’s global chaos, accelerated by mankind of course. After the warming will come another ice age, it’s iffy as to if mankind will survive those though. Actually, there is no point in you worrying about it, unless like me you are omnipresent.

Alternate fuels, a lot of talk in the news about them these days, some of them turn out not to be all that great, what to run on. My monkey boats ran on water and my monkey motorcycles could run on dirt. My monkeymobiles ran on asphalt and dirt. LOL

NYIMU COUNTY, China (Reuters) - China is to hold talks with envoys of the Dalai Lama, the spiritual leader of Tibetan Buddhism whom it blames for a wave of unrest, state media reported on Friday, as the Olympic flame arrived in Japan.

I wish that the Dalai Lama would just shut up, I wish that everyone would shut up about their religions, they all cause too many problems.

FEMALE PRAYER:
Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man who's not a creep. One who's handsome, smart and strong, One who loves to listen long, One who thinks before he speaks. When he says he'll call, he won't wait
weeks. I pray that he is gainfully employed. When I spend his cash, won't be annoyed. Pulls out my chair and opens my door, Massages my back and begs to do more. Oh! Send me a man who'll make love to my
mind and knows what to answer to "How big is my behind?" I pray that this man will love me to no end, And never attempt to hit on my friend. Amen.

MALE PRAYER:
I pray for a deaf-mute nymphomaniac with huge tits who owns a liquor store. Amen

Actually, I know a big titted nymphomaniac that owns two bars but I’m smart enough not to get involved with her. I guess I will go to the war protest today, what will you be doing today?

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs… BBC

Friday, April 25, 2008

Lazy God Theory

Duh !!! We fix it or it gets busted and unable to support us. This god is a spiritual thing only, and it is us.

Welcome, thanks for visiting Polly’s Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse. Still a virgin? Well this is your lucky day, we start rumors, fires, incite riots, and convert virgins… LOL

Rick and I keep talking about the monkeys and the monkeys we are, Rick gets evolution. When Alan is at his shop he keeps insisting that he isn’t a monkey, next time I see him I will ask him how the alien is. Maybe us monkeys will have to dispose of him. LOL

Got my electric bill yesterday, $71.99, not bad considering that I was heating the camper project some when working on it and using the air compressor a lot, and it was colder than normal for this time of year, and that the rates have gone up.

Got insulation and paneling installed on the front of the camper yesterday. Should be able to put the side panels on today. Used two different kinds of panel materials because this is a low budget recycling job and I used scraps from other projects. It’ll look fine after painting it. I took a pic of it but it was too dark so I can’t regale you with my beautiful work. LOL

This link should at least get the males attentionWORLDS SEXIEST WOMEN

A STUPID FUCKING PRESIDENT

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Backup

Well, if the truck breaks down out in the country I can always unload the backup and get back to town. LOL…. Just kidding, enough friendly and helpful monkeys around here that someone would stop and give this monkey a ride unless I was out in a remote area where others wasn’t.

I’ve noticed that comment sections on blogs are as much as becoming like chat sites. Someone will leave a remark and the blog owner or others will reply to that person, I’m guilty of that myself. If a person is visiting many blogs this can keep them very busy even if they are using Google Reader. I haven’t gotten around to using Google Reader and may not get around to it.

There are only a few blogs I revisit once I leave a comment so if others reply I’m not going to see it anyway. Well, we’re just a bunch of monkeys mucking around and I see little hope in blogs actually helping fix the world so I guess we’ll just keep mucking around.

There are a few couples, very few, having spiritual sex on this planet, not many of them though, and they are not talking about it, that I know of. Other than sharing it on the Internet.

First I was alone
Then there was you
Now we are two
Yet, we are one

But separated
Connected only though the web
It’s sad
Sighs

EXCUSES FOR NOT GOING GREEN

Default notices on homes are up 143 percent in California, so many people want more home than they really need and take on loans they shouldn’t be taking on. I’ve owned a number of homes and properties, but never bought anything that would test my ability to pay on the mortgage if things got tight. If you have a home and still don’t have extra money you have taken on too much. Or don’t know how to run a proper budget, like my daughter that wastes so much money.

MORE GREEN
EVEN MORE GREEN

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

So soon?

It’s Wednesday already, laundry day here at Polly’s Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse, and my once a month payday. It seems like time just keeps going by faster.

For those of you who still do not have kids let me point out one of the biggest drawbacks of parenthood. Eventually you have to spend time with your children.

A famous sex therapist was on the radio taking questions when a caller asked, "Doctor, I'd like to know why men always want to marry a virgin?" To which the doctor handily replied, "To avoid criticism!"

Frankly, I was never interested in having a virgin, not sure how guys wanting to have virgins got popular, but I’ll bet a lot of it has to do with the screwed up religions.

A friend, who worked away from home all week, always made a special effort to be with his family on the weekends. Every Saturday morning he would take his 7-year old grand- daughter out for a drive in the car for some bonding time. Just he and his granddaughter.

One particular Sunday however, he had a bad cold and really didn't feel like being up at all. Luckily, his wife came to the rescue and took their granddaughter out. When they returned, the little girl anxiously ran upstairs to see her grandfather.

"Well, did you enjoy your ride with grandma?" "Oh yes, Papa" the girl replied, "and do you know what? We didn't see a single dumb bastard or lousy shit head anywhere we went today!"

I am prepared to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

I put my rant on MY OTHER BLOG

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Earth day



It’s Earth Day here, and many other places, but it needs to be Earth Day everyday in order to save this planet. Please be kind to the planet today.

I don’t think we can save the planet with seven billion people on it, all wanting what America and some other countries have. People have to get wiser and get the populations down, and become less greedy and more peaceful, I have little hope that they will do that.

I’m guessing that the populations will come down in ugly ways, wars and such, or nature will simply not be able to support man anymore and go on without him, and be better off without him.

I just don’t understand how people can be, Rick is one of my best friends but sometimes he really irks me. He not only was going to take a brand new TV dish and receivers to the landfill (that I quickly found a new home for on Yahoo Freecycle) but someone had given him two new tires that he was going to take there. They were mounted on rims that wouldn’t fit his pickup and had winter studs in them so was going to toss them and buy new ones.

He needed new tires but was just going to buy some, fuck that, I dug all the studs out and he took them to the tire shop and had them put on his rims. Like it says on my coffee cup, I’m surrounded by fuckin’ idiots. I also gave an ironing board to a lady on Freecycle yesterday.

EARTH DAY

Hopper, remind me to check on how your story is developing, hugs.

I posted some pictures about my adventure to the yurt yesterday on MY OTHER BLOG

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Monday, April 21, 2008

My Tootsie-Pop

Tootsie-Pop
Tootsie-Pop
Oh how I love my little
Tootsie-Pop

Popped her in the kitchen
And I popped her in the hall
Popped her in the bedroom
And I popped her against the wall

Popped her in the mountains
And I popped her at the mall
Popped her at her Mothers
And I popped her at her Pa’s

She grabbed my song
In the garage
And I popped her
On our rod

I popped her in the yard
And I popped her on the sod.
I popped her on the fountain
And I popped her on our rod

Tootsie-Pop oh
Tootsie-Pop
Oh how I love my little
Tootsie-Pop-Pop-Pop

I got an email from the president of the local chapter of THE INSANE CHICKS SOCIETY (TICS) that reminded me of an old saying. She said, “My world does not revolve around money either, and I don't want to hear this bullshit any more from you.”

It reminded me of a old saying so I shot back with, “I hear what you are saying but I see what you are doing. It’s interesting to me that people can lie to themselves and not see it.”

Hell, she owns two fancy properties here, goes to bat shit crazy California to earn big bucks and spends them on her properties here. Don’t tell me that her world doesn’t revolve around money, I’m not that frigging stupid.

Mary came over yesterday, she lives on the block behind me, she was looking for something to sift the dirt in her garden through. I just happened to have a neat sifter I made when I worked on an organic farm so I gave it to her. If I ever need another I’ll make one.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Sunday, April 20, 2008

Dump day


Dump day is very popular here, it only happens once a year, you can take all you can get on a load for ten bucks that goes to the food bank. Ironic that it’s on Sundays, won’t be as many in churches today, it’s a good thing. Get in line, check out others loads, maybe grab a few things, bullshit with others and drink coffee, go piss in the woods, it’s all good. The metals are on the top, they go to a recycling pile.

This place still doesn’t look like Martha Stewart was here, but fuck her. Someone should screw that woman, any takers?

It’s good to be optimistic and say that America isn’t going to hell, but it’s stupid to not do some planing and be prepared for hard times.

I went to Helen’s yesterday and it went something like this. “I need your ash shovel, I need to shovel some asses.” She giggles and says something about shoveling asses then says, “Don’t forget to clean it before you bring it back.” “Don’t forget to lecture me.” “Well get out of here before I think of something else.” She has a great sense of humor and has known me for years and understands me and thinks I’m the most interesting man she has ever met.

Random thought…. When the going gets tough the tough get naked.

Tomorrow I’m posting a poem, or maybe it’s a song. Some will think it’s raunchy, others will love it, whatever. Opinions always vary, the spirits have always been raunchy.

I guess it’s time to also toss one of my work coats as much as I hate to toss my clothes that seem to have become a part of me. And someday maybe I should fix that dent in the door of the truck, it was there when I got it.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Saturday, April 19, 2008

Bio-fuels

I went to the beach on Thursday, it’s a beautiful and peaceful place to ponder on things. I do that a lot, ponder on things. I took that picture while I was there. I took others also, but don’t know that I will post them.

I see in the news that some folks are finely realizing that bio-fuels are a mistake, it’s about time. The problem now is to get rid of that program because a lot of monkeys won’t want to. Especially those getting government subsidies because of the stupid political monkeys.

It turns out that there is food bank drive at the landfill this year, ten bucks for all I can get on the truck, so today I’m putting a load together, will get this place tidied up a bit.

Got an email from the president of the local chapter of THE INSANE CHICKS SOCIETY, (note that the first letter of each word spells out TICS *LOL*) she is going to be returning to this area before the end of the month. Nice butt, nice boobs, but we just drive each other nuts. She is a control freak and an empire builder and I don’t give a damn about her properties.

She gets it in her head how it is going to play out when we get together, but it never plays out the way it was in her head because I fucking show up and put a stick in the spokes. LOL “Would you like a beer, Bill?” “Sure, thanks.” “What kind?” “Boobs” “What?” “Um, what did I say?” That girl just don’t know how to relax and go with the flow. If she wants to go by a script she needs to give me a copy of it before the rehearsal. That’s what I do, but they embarrass her. Oh well, sing a happy song, la, la, la.

Does your date or mate want you to take her to an expensive place? Take her to a service station.

A rude New Yorker and his girlfriend were driving across the desert when they had a flat tire on the car. Getting out, the boyfriend was about to start changing it when he spotted a cowboy sitting on his horse, rolling a smoke.

He told his girlfriend that he would make the cowboy change the tire and for her just to wait there. "Hey, parrrrtner," he mocked, "Hows about you get down off of that horse and come over here and change this tire." The cowboy continued to roll the smoke and ignored him. "Hey, Shithead, I told you to get over here and change this tire or I'm going to kick your ass."

The cowboy looked at him and then said, "I'll tell you what, fella. I'm going to finish my smoke. Then I'm going to get down off my horse, kick your ass and make you change that tire. Then while I screw your girlfriend I'm gonna make you hold my balls up out of the hot sand."

Later, as they were driving on across the desert, the girlfriend says, "That cowboy was pretty tough, wasn't he, baby?" "Naw, he wasn't so tough," said the guy. "Did you see him flinch every time I dropped his balls in the hot sand?"

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Friday, April 18, 2008

Time

The trick about life is to make it look easy and fun, like in the graphic.

Time is an interesting and useful tool for the monkeys I guess. But it means nothing to the universe/cosmos.

On his blog Billy P posted about the hormones they are putting in meats these days. Spirit isn’t much worried about it, spirit is full of hornymones and will screw those hormones to death, ha, ha, ha. Spirit is a scientist and will in time figure out what is good and bad when it comes to food science and making improvements on natures foods.

Actually many food sources are being messed with these days, just about everything we eat has been messed with, much of it for some time now. And spirit has no problem with that. What spirit has a problem with is the greedy factor, that produces foods that may not be right but are great for the profit margin.

A really cool home that this country spirit could live in. COOL COUNTRY HOME. Trying to build one on the cheap in this country would be hard though, the official monkeys would put many road blocks in your way and drive the cost way up, if they even let you build such a home. Not that it would stop me from building one, spirit doesn’t get permission from the official monkeys when I do things here.

I gutted this place out and re-did it without permits, permits? I don’t need no fucking permits. And I don’t know any empire building women around here that would live in such a home. The ones available to me all think they deserve so much more, screw them, spirit continues to live alone as he has for ten years now. I wouldn’t stick my dick in any of them, don’t get me started, you know how I get.

A first, it cost over fifty bucks to fill the gas tank yesterday. I’m looking forward to it costing a hundred bucks, for reasons most can’t fathom.

What is the difference between an Irish wedding and an Irish wake? At the wake there is one less drunk.

And Scott Adams has become a babbling idiot, with the stupid idea that we are simply part of a cosmic computer program. That little monkey sure has changed since he got married to that empire building monkey, but I guess he likes sticking his dick in her so will kiss her butt so that he can. Never been much of a butt kisser myself. You can have the testosterone but not the Cadillac.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Thursday, April 17, 2008

A bit most days

I get a bit done on the little camper most days. I now have 18 inches of the overhead deck I had cut out replaced, and new front framing back in. Yesterday I filled some areas with spray foam insulation. Next I will install some foam panel insulation and the paneling.

It may seem like a shame to use a nice piece of oak that is only surface weathered and could be made pretty again in such a place but it’s strong and was free and looking for a place to serve again instead of going to a landfill or being used for firewood. And it was free!! It’s at a 15 degree angle so the bottom framing also had to be cut at a 15 degree angle. And the uprights cut to match it.

Anyway, it’s coming along and will be ready for trips to the beaches before to long. That is where spirit finds a beautiful world, at the beaches and in the mountains. All I see in town is a bunch of monkeys messing around.

Shakespearian Insult Kit

Next time that you are at a loss for a good insult, use this handy table to construct a Shakespearean insult. Combine one word from each of the three columns below, and preface it with the word "Thou":

| artless | base-court | apple-john |
| bawdy | bat-fowling | baggage |
| beslubbering | beef-witted | barnacle |
| bootless | beetle-headed | bladder |
| churlish | boil-brained | boar-pig |
| cockered | clapper-clawed | bugbear |
| clouted | clay-brained | bum-bailey |
| craven | common-kissing | canker-blossom |
| currish | crook-pated | clack-dish |
| dankish | dismal-dreaming| clotpole |
| dissembling | dizzy-eyed | coxcomb |
| droning | doghearted | codpiece |
| errant | dread-bolted | death-token |
| fawning | earth-vexing | dewberry |
| fobbing | elf-skinned | flap-dragon |
| froward | fat-kidneyed | flax-wench |
| frothy | fen-sucked | flirt-gill |
| gleeking | flap-mouthed | foot-licker |
| goatish | fly-bitten | fustilarian |
| gorbellied | folly-fallen | giglet |
| impertinent | fool-born | gudgeon |
| infectious | full-gorged | haggard |
| jarring | guts-griping | harpy |
| loggerheaded | half-faced | hedge-pig |
| lumpish | hasty-witted | horn-beast |
| mammering | hedge-born | hugger-mugger |
| mangled | hell-hated | joithead |
| mewling | idle-headed | lewdster |
| paunchy | ill-breeding | lout |
| pribbling | ill-nurtured | maggot-pie |
| puking | knotty-pated | malt-worm |
| puny | milk-livered | mammet |
| qualling | motley-minded | measle |
| rank | onion-eyed | minnow |
| reeky | plume-plucked | miscreant |
| roguish | pottle-deep | moldwarp |
| ruttish | pox-marked | mumble-news |
| saucy | reeling-ripe | nut-hook |
| spleeny | rough-hewn | pigeon-egg |
| spongy | rude-growing | pignut |
| surly | rump-fed | puttock |
| tottering | shard-borne | pumpion |
| unmuzzled | sheep-biting | ratsbane |
| vain | spur-galled | scut |
| venomed | swag-bellied | skainsmate |
| villainous | tardy-gaited | strumpet |
| warped | tickle-brained | varlet |
| wayward | toad-spotted | vassal |
| weedy | unchin-snouted | whey-face |
| yeasty | weather-bitten | wagtail |

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs... BBC

Wednesday, April 16, 2008

The cupcake

The lovely DIANA sent me a card with a cupcake on the face of it. No, she didn’t email it, she personally made a card just for me and sent it to me in a snail mail. Remember snail mail? And those warm fuzzy things you used to get in them that you could touch and enjoy? The internet is wonderful, but for warm and fuzzy you can’t beat getting something that you can feel with your fingers.

I eagerly opened the card hoping that she had enclosed a picture of her ‘cupcakes’, but no such luck. *sighs* I’m teasing of course, I know little about her and have no more than a passing interest in her. Hell, who am I kidding, spirit loves looking at cupcakes, I have lots of pictures of cupcakes on my computer, I’ve posted some of them on my blogs. Artful ones, I don’t do hard porn and vaginas, just art. Some would call boobs porn but I don’t.

It really is a lovely card. She has very nice penmanship. My penmanship looks like a monkey wrote it with his tail, or his dick. And she had very nice things to say about me, I guess she can see under the grumpy exterior. The card now presides on my bulletin board.

I wasn’t going to do a tax return this year, but the government wants to give me 300 bucks for fifteen minutes of work to fill out the form. A stimulus payment they call it, hoping that we will use the money to kick start the economy. But I’ll use it to pay off the rest of my new computer, fuck the government and the rich.

A DRY TOWN ….. In a small midwestern conservative town, there wasn't a place to get a drink for miles around, so a local entrepreneur saw an opportunity: He started to build a tavern. Liking a "dry" town, the local church started a campaign to block the bar from opening with petitions and prayers. The businessman was polite when congregants came to protest, but work continued on the tavern.

But the night before the grand opening, a lightning strike hit the bar and it burned to the ground. The church folks were rather smug in their piousness after that -- until the bar owner sued the church on the grounds that the church was ultimately responsible for the destruction of his building, either through direct or indirect actions or means.

The church vehemently denied all responsibility or any connection to the building's demise in its reply to the court. At the first hearing, the judge held up the paperwork and looked at the lawyers on both sides of the lawsuit. "I don't know how I'm going to decide this," the judge said, "but as it appears from the paperwork, we have a bar owner that believes in the power of prayer, and an entire church congregation that doesn't."

THE RIGHT TO DIE

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

A cool tool !!

I have two saber saws (jigsaws), and they are okay, but I recently bought this really cool air powered saw, they are used a lot in body shops I guess. This saw has a lot shorter and faster stroke than the other kind, it’s just a busy happy short stroking fucker. Um, my mind is wandering again.

It has an adjustable guide and can be removed for full depth (get your mind back in place). It’s been handy on the camper project where I removed framing and had to cut it out and leave the aluminum skin intact. It’s the handiest little saber type saw I’ve ever owned and I like the way it cuts smoother than others with longer strokes (not that long strokes are bad), every craftsman should have one.

With the right attachment this handy little busy bee would be great for, um, never mind.

Laura says that I have the blood pressure and pulse of a twenty-year-old, that’s what they all say when I get checked. That’s not bad for 64 years of often grueling work hours and hard work. Not to mention smoking and drinking through all of it. And that stupid little dick still thinks it’s 20 also. It’s a good thing I have a gentle nature or they would have to lock me up in a safe place. Yes, I bitch and rant a lot, but it’s just a way to let off steam, it beats physical aggression.

As for getting my teeth cleaned and checked, it was very trying, even with two shots, my teeth are very sensitive for some unknown reason. And that fancy sonic vibrating cleaning pik or whatever it is, fuck that thing, it sends me right through the roof. But the women there seem to love me, they like my twisted sense of humor and telling them that it’s okay to hurt me because it’s the only chance they will get. I allow them to hurt my teeth, but not my heart. Half way through the session she was calling me honey. Huh? I like her but I didn’t feel the need to put my hand on her butt.

While at the dentist office I read an article about how they are getting so good at predicting the weather, and would be getting even better at it. Do you think they are? The reports never fit here, BTW, the article was dated 1973. Man is screwing up this planet too much to even get close to predicting the weather. A butterfly flapping its wings in South America can affect this planet, just think what all those jet planes up there are doing to it. I know, you don’t care if you want to go somewhere.

You are a fascist, oh yes you are, think about it. Think it out and you will see that you are.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Monday, April 14, 2008

Strange requests

Get it? Ha, ha, ha.

A young camper at summer camp asked the chaplain if "hard on" was hyphenated. The chaplain replies, "What in heaven's name are you writing home about!" The young boy says, "I'm telling Mom and Dad about the project we worked so 'hard on'."

They had a computer recycling drive here Saturday so I recycled some of my old computers. I still had the first 286 I bought. But it was expensive, they need to make it more affordable to recycle computers in this country.

The monkey that was supposed to tow the trailer from here for the Lisa monkey wasn’t getting around to doing it but she did call me. So yesterday I pulled it to a tire stores lot, with their permission. She’ll have it towed from there, or not. If they get tired of it being on their lot they can call me and I will bring it back over here and use it for storage.

Ron, did spirit give you permission to insult his readers? Oh – Okay, carry on then.

A wife one evening drew her husband's attention to the couple next door and said, "Do you see that couple, how devoted they are? He kisses her every time they meet. Why don't you do that?" "I don't know her well enough."

You old timers, do you remember the old Johnny Fuckerfaster joke?

The administration of this particular elementary school decided to start a more inclusive policy on which words were "bad" words. Among those initiated to the category was "suck" (when not referring to the principle of suction).

One day a child came up to the teacher to inform her that one of the other students had said a bad word. "What was the bad word he said?" asked the teacher. "I can't say it." "It's ok to tell me, you won't get in trouble for it." "No, it's too bad, I don't want to say it."

"Well I have to know what he said in order to punish him. Can you tell me what it is without saying it?" "Well... it rhymes with 'fuck'."

GRANTHAM, Pa. - Democratic Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton said Sunday that the potential for life begins at conception as she and presidential rival Sen. Barack Obama answered questions about faith and religion in both their personal lives and the public discourse. In a forum devoted to an issue rare on the campaign trail, the two White House hopefuls talked about the presence of God in their lives and how often they read the Bible as well as divisive issues such as abortion, abstinence and human rights within the context of faith.

Spirit is so sick and tired of hearing about this omnipotent biblical god. Now I don’t even want to vote for or support Obama. This country is so fucked, but no one ever listens to me.

I have a dental appointment this morning, Laura is going to clean my six teeth. ROFLMAO.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Sunday, April 13, 2008

Celebrating our weirdness


I can turn your crank – Baby

I’m a heavy-duty model with a 200 AMP boost, I can get those juices flowing.

Let’s see, red is positive and black is negative, got it. (clamp) (clamp) *CLICK*

Ah yeah, you’re sizzling now baby. Here I’ll just stick this rod in you to check your electrolyte levels.

ooooooOh, baby you’re charged up now, that feels gooood. Get it up, get it in, get it on but don’t mess up her hair dooooo.

I can charm the pants off of a Christian girl, just can’t have sex with her, tried that a few years back with a spoiled self centered Catholic brat.

Hum, it’s getting weird around here, this is a goofy post. Ha, ha, ha. Well, must celebrate our weirdness. Happy Naked Pagan Dancing and all that.

Camper update: Been working on it some.

I went to Beer Church for a bit yesterday – asked Rod if Char putting a dent in his car got him any extra nooky – curious minds like to know – then everyone started talking about sex and it got pretty interesting for a while.

Wonder what it’s like where I live? Check out some of our web cams. And there are also picture links on that site, the link to the panorama views is pretty interesting. WEB CAMS

Oh, I actually have a 200 amp battery charger much like the one in the picture, kept it when I sold my parts house.

I put another post on my other blog, if you want to stay light today don’t go there. My other blog

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Saturday, April 12, 2008

PRICELESS !!!

I like to officiate at weddings. But things can go wrong during the dove release.
Wedding Gown $2,500.
Photographer $2,000
Having 'the twins' pop out and say CHEESE in front of your family and friends...
PRICELESS!!!!!


The picture was not taken at any wedding I’ve officiated at, I should be so lucky, a lady sent it to me in an email. My favorite weddings are the ones I do outside, in nature, I haven’t done a nude one, yet.

I’ve been too busy recently to visit a lot of blogs other than hit and miss, someone keeps distracting me, I apologize if I haven’t been by to irritate you. LOL

It was a decent day yesterday – over 60 degrees for a while - lots of sun - I was outside sitting on the porch – on my porta-pottie taking a crap - and was reminded of the time I looked out the window and saw my young daughter squatting in the front yard taking a leak – Because “It’s boring in the bathroom.” I wonder where she got that from. ;-)

Knock - Knock
(Opens door)
Official: Mr. Cook, you can’t have a sheep here.
Mr. Cook: Last summer you told me I have to keep my grass mowed so that it meets your expectations of Martha Stewart pretty.
Official: That doesn’t mean that you can mow it with a sheep.
Mr. Cook: Fuck you, that’s my fucking lawnmower, you leave my girlfriend alone (Montana joke). Oh, and fuck Martha Stewart, she has fucked up enough women on this planet. She is just a stupid capitalistic man with a pussy.
*Slams door shut*

"There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them."

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Friday, April 11, 2008

Cheer up guys

If you are having a bad day and feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have a mate, remember: Yours could look like a dick with buckteeth, that is a Naked Mole-Rat from Africa.

I wasn’t looking to own cats, a stray had them in my yard, she got hurt just about the time they were old enough to be weaned, she went to the vet and never returned so I became their mother. I provide a home for them, other than that I don’t pay a lot of attention to them. Two are pretty friendly and demand some attention, the other two think I’m just here to feed them and won’t have anything to do with me.

Some quotes credited to George Bernard Shaw
A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.

A veteran journalist has never had time to think twice before he writes.

Alcohol is the anesthesia by which we endure the operation of life.

All great truths begin as blasphemies.

Americans adore me and will go on adoring me until I say something nice about them.

An asylum for the sane would be empty in America. [Hell, anywhere]

Capitalism has destroyed our belief in any effective power but that of self interest backed by force.

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

Democracy is a device that insures we shall be governed no better than we deserve.

Democracy is a form of government that substitutes election by the incompetent many for appointment by the corrupt few.

Do not try to live forever. You will not succeed.

Except during the nine months before he draws his first breath, no man manages his affairs as well as a tree does. (Ditto with women)

Human beings are the only animals of which I am thoroughly and cravenly afraid.

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy.

Independence? That's middle class blasphemy. We are all dependent on one another, every soul of us on earth.

Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.

Patriotism is your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Thursday, April 10, 2008

Pussy – Pussy everywhere

We don’t have high journalistic standards here at Polly’s Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse. My words just leap out naked.

Yesterday a lady told me that I’m weird, I’m taking that as a compliment. So was Einstein, Richard P. Feynman, Di Vinci, people like that. I just haven’t achieved my fame, yet.

I was in the lumber yard to pay my bill yesterday and Bill Sommers came over to talk to me for a bit. I like to leave snarky comments on his blog. LOL

It’s guys like me that make things like this. ELECTRIC CAR ON A BEER BUDGET

There is getting to be too much pussy around here. I took Helen to the store yesterday for her monthly supply of cat food, she has two cats and loves cats, too much. She spends over fifty bucks a month on cat food. She spoils her cats, my cats, and all the strays that come over here and get in fights with our cats.

I love cats, but damn it, I don’t want twenty of them hanging out around here. If it has wheels or it is a pussy it’s going to give you problems, but what can you do but love them? Damn it, spread the love around, anyone want a stray pussy? A gray cat started showing up here, I wonder if it is a male, I make sure any pussies around here are fixed so it won’t do him any good, and this old post about me trapping a tom cat to get him fixed is sort of amusing. I don’t know who owns him, and I didn’t get permission to get him fixed. Permission? I don’t need no fucking permission, that pussy was in my space, if you don’t want me fucking with your pussy keep it home. LOL
PISSED OFF PUSSY

Thought for the day: There is more money being spent on breast implants and Viagra today than on Alzheimer's research. This means that by 2040, there should be a large elderly population with perky boobs and huge erections and absolutely no recollection of what to do with them.

Turtles can breathe through their rear end. I know a few assholes that talk through theirs. I can exhale through mine.

MY THOUGHTS ON SOME NEWS
Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Not interested


The pussy’s here at Polly’s Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse are not interested in cute little fluff butts other than when they are feeling playful and want a swat toy. They don’t think there is enough meat on those little ankle biters to make a decent shish kebab and the last thing they need is a big hairball.

PUSSY’S YAWN AND GO BACK TO SLEEP

Remember now, ceiling cat is watching you masturbate.

I have a bag of wood pellets here that were given to me so I did an experiment yesterday. I think I can come up with a simple way to burn pellets, but not now, I have other projects going now.

Out of chaos shall come the New World Order. -- George Herbert Walker Bush

And it’s not going to be anything like that monkey thinks it will be. Doesn’t matter, he won’t be here to see it.

WASHINGTON - The presidential campaign of Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton said Tuesday that her husband, the former president, supports a free trade agreement with Colombia that she strenuously opposes.

Okay, her screwed up christian background is starting to creep in. Never mind, my thoughts on this would be over most heads.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

New framing


Let’s just stick to human monkey stuff today. Debra Kay, the reason I’m interested in heating with wood pellets is because if burned properly they are energy efficient and less polluting than burning firewood. And the price is right in this area. But I don’t want to spend well over a thousand dollars for a high tech stove to burn them in. It requires electricity to run them and they are complex with electronic control boards and such and I like simple things that work well.

I have owned one pellet stove, but it was pretty much junk so I didn’t use it long. The factory gave me a new ‘improved’ model but I wasn’t impressed with it either. And my place is small, the store bought stoves would be overkill. I’ve been doing some research and may try some things on my own, I have all the tools and equipment to do that with.

As for just building a fire, I do that some times. But it bothers me at times that I’m adding to the pollution.

Anyway, about the pictures. I mentioned recently that I had bought a combination brad nailer and staple gun. A cheap one, just 20 bucks, but it will drive a 2 inch brad and a 1 ½ inch staple, this is very handy for some of my building and restoration projects.

I’m currently putting new framing in the overhang of the camper, the berth area. Using thin galvanized mental plates (on both sides), the staple gun allows me to create nice strong joints without dowels or complex joints. Being a cheap gun it wasn’t working quite right but I tore it apart four or five times until I got it working to my standards.

I don’t often ask other monkeys to help when working on projects, the other monkeys are busy doing other monkey stuff and many things I do could use an extra hand or two, like when I was working on getting the separated skin on the camper back together. Over the years I’ve learned a lot about getting things done alone. I needed to push the front back some to get it to reach the other skin, to get and hold it in the proper place while I worked to getting the two pieces mated back together. Mated, my mind just wandered, ha, ha, ha.

I also recently bought some clamps that not only clamp but can be converted to spread things, like the legs of virgins, ha, ha, ha. That isn’t a pretty picture and is cluttered, like my mind, but it does illustrate my solution. I backed my pickup toward the front of the camper and used a couple of pieces of 2X4’s set behind the hitch ball so I had a support to push from. Then I used a piece of ¾ inch PVC pipe over the spreader bar to push against a short 2X4 on the face of the overhang.

Bored yet? There was also a vertical 2X4 (I added a yellow line to it to help you identify it) going to the ground that was holding a horizontal board (blue) to keep the lower sheet in place. This is better than getting another monkey to help because they will stay in place for as long as I need them to without complaining like monkeys do, in this case about an hour while I got the metal straightened and folded back over.

I’ve worked with some monkeys that were good craftsman and understood what I was doing and didn’t question me and just helped with no problems, but I’ve worked with plenty that I wished were somewhere else. I started building a garage for a man a few years ago, he had hired me and a lady monkey to build it. She decided that she was the project boss, I didn’t care, she could be the boss if she wanted to.

But I couldn’t work with her, she hadn’t been a carpenter for long and her ways were different than mine, and she wasn’t worth a damn at communicating to me what she was expecting me to do. The cement floor and foundation was already there, I had done it a few weeks before we started the building. I worked with her about three days and we had a large part of the framing done and the side panels on when I got tired of her being short with me so I told her too take a flying fuck and went home.

She complained to the man about me and tried to make it sound like I was an idiot but I had completed many projects for him over a number of years so he knew it wasn’t me.

The man hired another helper for her and she was putting roof truss’s up and doing it wrong when the owner pointed it out. She got in a pissing contest with him and got her ass fired. He called me and I went back and finished the job. Just one of my many experiences on this silly planet.

Ever been fired from a job? I have a few times, when I couldn’t get the boss properly trained. LOL No big deal, I just went on to other things, there are always other things to do that suits me. I don’t understand people that stay at jobs they are not happy with. It’s never bothered me to leave a job I was not enjoying, but I’m a free spirit and need no one else’s so called job or security.

Yesterday I went into the computer shop I bought my new computer from. The same shop that I also signed up for my high speed Internet ISP through. I was just looking for a little help getting the new cable modem that I got off of Yahoo Freecycle working, I’m sure that I have to give the computer a little information about it. Type in some code or address or something.

I got stuck talking to a monkey that I’ve talked to a few other times because the monkey I wanted to talk to was on the phone. I tell him that I have another brand of cable modem that I want to use so I can return the one I’m paying rent for to Wavecable but it won’t work. He starts talking down to me, told me that I didn’t have a cable modem. Hey, I’m not a fucking computer geek, I’m willing to admit that I don’t know as much about them as I once did because I got tired of trying to keep up with it all.

BUT I FUCKING KNOW WHAT A CABLE MODEM IS !!! I just wanted some help getting it working. He pitched some other shit on me and I said right in front of the other customers there, “I don’t like talking to you, I like talking to that guy because he is always more helpful than you are.” I figured that all the monkeys there needed to hear that. And then I walked out of the fucking store, fuck him, I’ll figure out to get it working, that is what I have a brain for. I can rebuild an automatic transmission, I’ve rebuilt hundreds of them, I can figure out how to get a fucking cable modem working, it’s just easier if you have some helpful advice.

I posted something interesting on my other blog this morning. FRANKENKINDER

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Monday, April 07, 2008

Spring has sprung & it’s mating season

Where am I?

This zoo is ran by a bunch of monkeys and it’s mating season. Okay, so moose don’t mate in the spring but apparently it’s okay for them to screw statues?

Don’t pay any attention to spirit, been thinking about, sex. It’s not as if I’m not thinking about it all the time anyway. The spirits are always horney, it’s just all the monkey business that screws everything up.

After looking at the news I guess I have nothing else to say today, this world is too depressing.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Riding along in our monkeymobile

Spirit likes to change songs, mess with others ‘intellectual property, copyrights’. If they don’t like it they can sue spirit. Good luck with that, they won’t stop him from doing it. Spirit is just improving their work. It’s called artistic license or some other monkey mumble jumble like that.

Riding along in our monkeymobile
My baby beside me at the wheel
Easing along on a country road
With no particular place to go

My arm slung around her neck
My hand in her bra caressing her tit
Her hand in my lap caressing my dick
Looking for a place to park in the sticks

Easing along in our monkeymoblie
Enjoying the sun on the hills
Seeking a place to get our thrills
Somewhere out there in the hills

(Contributed by Debra Kay)
Ring ring goes the bell
Cop car comes crashing through the dell
Just when things were getting good
Hell there goes the neighborhood

Ah, the good old days before everything got so screwed up and women got so hard to get along with. Feel free to use your artistic license and add another verse.

Another great song.
You don’t know what you do to me
I never knew how much I missed until I kissed you

I never knew how much I missed until I sexed you

The Lisa monkey called yesterday, she is doing well in treatment it seems, and is coming over with a friend she works for at times so he can pull the 22 foot camp trailer to his place. It works for me, she can fill it full of the crap she collects and then wander off and leave him stuck with all of it. Well, that is her history, I don’t expect it to change.

JACKSON, Miss. (AP) - Strong thunderstorms toppled trees, knocked out power and damaged homes Friday across the South, while flooding in Kentucky forced evacuations and left a 2-year-old girl dead.

Rather than calling it global warming I think it should be called man made global chaos. Expect it to get worse.

WASHINGTON - It's no longer a question of recession or not. Now it's how deep and how long. Workers' pink slips stacked ever higher in March as jittery employers slashed 80,000 jobs, the most in five years, and the national unemployment rate climbed to 5.1 percent. Job losses are nearing the staggering level of a quarter-million this year in just three months.

Whatever, I’ve been preparing for it for some time, it won’t have much of an effect on me.

James W dropped by yesterday, was having his truck serviced near by so walked over for a chat. James is a very interesting man, big man, well traveled and experienced author that just never shuts up and is most interesting to talk to. We don’t see each other often but I’ve known him for years, gave him some private computer lessons not long after moving here. His wife died recently, it was nice chatting with him.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs……. BBC

Saturday, April 05, 2008

More items of interest

Raquel Welch was one hot momma in her time. Spirit wasn’t aware that she had sang with Tom Jones though. TUTTI FRUTTI Not the best performance of this song but definitely entertaining.

IT’S NOT FUN GETTING HIT IN THE NUTS

I’ve never been big on them, actually I could care less, but to each his/her own I guess. HOW ABOUT A BLOW JOB?

A rant from TZ
Work is starting to piss me off. People are actually expecting me to do stuff. All day long it's, "TZ, can you help me with this?" TZ, did you finish that?" Yo, asswipe, the only thing I 'Finnished' was that broad on the back side of mountain in Sweden when I was skiing there.

"TZ, this is late." "TZ, this is due" "TZ, TZ, TZ!"

Hey, leave me alone, okay? If after all these years you need me to start working now, then this company is fucked. If there is so much to do then let's hire another monkey and get him to do it. It's good for his family, it's good for the economy, hell, I bet it's even good for the war on terror. So hire someone else
to do this shit and help support the troops... or bring them home... I don't give a fuck, just leave me the hell alone.


Spirit is all for the Muslims killing all the Christians, and the sooner the better. On the flip flop spirit is all for the Christians killing all the Muslims, and the sooner the better. Spirit just wishes that those stupid motherfuckers would take their stupid fucking fighting to a deserted island and leave the rest of us the fuck alone. Those stupid monkeys. Hey, don’t get me started, you know how I get.

Jesus kissed Mary’s tits and screwed her brains out, get the hell over it. At least they had a lot more fun than you idiots are having. They had more brains back then it seems. They worked just enough to get by, and partied and honored nature the rest of the time, in their own ways of the day. And the women wasn’t so hard to get along with, I’m surrounded by members of THE INSANE CHICKS SOCIETY now, we just drive each other nuts but I’ve gotten wise and know that I want nothing to do with them and their damn empire building. I have chicken, I go to the beach, screw them, they can go to a fancy place and pay for their own fancy meals. I have peace, they have noise, spirit is not impressed.

Bernie was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end. Finally she couldn't take it any longer, and told him, "Listen, it means nothing, they even have a vice president of peas at the grocery store!"

"Really?" he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Bernie boy decided to call the grocery store. A clerk answered and Bernie said, "May I speak with the Vice President of peas, please?" The clerk replied, "Canned or frozen?"

"I once made love to a female clown. It was weird because she twisted my penis into a poodle." -- Dan Whitney

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - Democrat Hillary Clinton and her husband, former President Bill Clinton, have made $109 million since leaving the White House, including $51 million in speech income for Bill Clinton, according to eight years of tax records released on Friday.

$109 million in eight years. How much have you made during the last eight years? Do you see anything wrong with this picture? Spirit does. On the other hand, with money like that Bill can buy a lot of a lot of blow jobs because his wife is so busy being important and not servicing his needs. Go get some more blow jobs Bill, or just some great sex, it would be fun to catch you at it again, the rest of us monkeys love that kind of entertainment. Not that I cared what you was doing in the first place, it was just your Christian friends that did. It’s interesting that they slight you for doing the same things they do. Spirit is amused.

Being as it rained so much yesterday spirit polished his carrot inside. Well hey, there isn’t a female here to polish it, ya gotta do what ya gotta do. Spirit is not going without his sex and he isn’t in to raping women for it. Or begging for it.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Friday, April 04, 2008

TRY JESUS

Now if I was a woman and saw that bumper sticker on a car I would think, “Yeah, why not try Jesus? I’ll bet he is a real stud.”

As schools face cuts, top bosses enjoy perks
It’s headlines like this that are always keeping spirit pissed off.

It’s irritating that some videos make you watch a commercial first, but what the hell. SLEEPING BEAUTY'S

YOU'RE ALL I NEED TO GET BY

The picture is what the overhead, the bed area of the little pickup camper looks like now. I had to remove 18 inches of the deck because it was rotten, and a lot of the framing. And the outside skin was separated, I have the skin back together now and will now start installing new framing and decking. I’ve also removed the rest of the dumb ass rain gutter and installed pop rivets in the screw holes. That’s just a 2X4 you see in the window, helping hold down a plastic tarp I have over the camper.

It’s a Perris Valley camper, made in Mount Angel, Oregon in 1975. It was as well constructed as any campers made back then but I hope those little monkeys are better camper builders now.

Spirit maintains that the only original art is created by nature. And that is where the monkey artists get their ideas, were it not for nature everything would look like a bowl of gray soup and there would be none of the monkeys art that reflects nature or anything else. You little monkeys need to get over yourselves. I’m surrounded by art, free art. I get up everyday and look out at the mountains in the spiritual park I live next to. Do I need it on my wall? No. I need a little spiritual monkey to take up there and screw. Ah screw it, never mind.

I hauled Helen’s little monkey butt into town in the Pissant Express monkeymobile yesterday morning so she could do her monthly banking and we had breakfast at the Cornerhouse. It was a pretty nice day, for a change of pace I polished my carrot outside in nature.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs….. BBC

Thursday, April 03, 2008

New bridges

They are building two new bridges in town for the monkeys to wreck their little monkey cars on while fucking with their little monkey cell phones. The other day they transported a number of 135 to 155 foot beams through town, I live just two blocks off the main road so I went over and got a picture of the last one coming in. I’m guessing that it was a pretty tight fit on some of the turns they had to make. Those loads are over twice the length of the average truck and trailer.

This little monkey has never pulled a load that long. The longest beams I hauled in my trucking days was 65 feet. I emailed that picture to some folks and George S replied with, “Wow! Thanks! I suppose they didn't bring them in by barge because we didn't have a local crane big enough to off-load them.”

I shot back with, “I'm guessing that the same loader that launches the Westport pecker extensions could handle them. I don't recall where they came from, was made, but I suppose once they got them on trucks they just decided to come all the way with them. They must be pretty heavy judging by all the wheels, and the speed that truck came up the hill by Traylor's where I took the picture.”

Actually, they needed rear steering units, so I suppose they trucked them so that they would be here rather than barging them.

New readers will want to know what a Westport pecker extension is I suppose. It’s a 154 foot yacht that is built here. You can get on the list if you have 35 to 40 million bucks burning a hole in your pocket because you don't pay your employees well or provide health insurance for them. Or whatever it is that you do to screw others out of that much money.

All religions are external, spirit is internal.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs. … BBC

Wednesday, April 02, 2008

THELMA !!!

WANNA GO FOR A JOY RIDE???

1964 Buick Wildcat Convertible’s were cool cars, my brother had a red one. They had a 401, V8 engine, his had the optional 424 engine, four barrel carb, dual exhaust and gears that could really haul ass. 1964 was the only year for Sunburst Yellow, only 2 left in existence.

I only rode in my brothers Buick a few times, that fucking little un-evolved monkey was always getting his stupid little monkey ass in trouble. The last time was when we were bar hopping in Bellingham (back in the 60’s) and he picked a fight with another monkey on the street that was minding his own monkey business. They tossed his stupid little monkey ass in jail. Just as the monkey cops where putting him in the cop car he tossed me the keys to the Buick. That is the only time I ever drove it.

I drove it to his home and told his wife he was in jail and she used his coin collection to bail his stupid ass out. I took my wife and kids home and never saw him for about a year after that. Unfortunately I saw him to many times after that, until I refused to see the fucking idiot monkey anymore.

OLD WILDCAT COMMERICAL

It’s a wonder this retired retarded monkey gets much done some days. What with coming inside all the time to check the computer and whacking off and wandering around wondering what the monkey fuck I was doing in the first place. But it was nice yesterday and there was a lot of sun and I got some work done on the camper project, will post about that later.

Catching up on humor
While driving through a seedy area of San Diego, I noticed that sandwiched between a strip bar and a liquor store sat a storefront with all the windows suspiciously blacked out. Over the door was a sign that proudly declared, "Welcome to Kinko's. We have nothing to do with office supplies."

I drink in moderation. ‘Moderation' is an imaginary place that exists wherever I am.

Want to see what some of the local monkeys look like? LOCAL MONKEYS

Clinton compares herself to 'Rocky'
I compare her to Martha Stewart, a capitalist man with a vagina.

Woozie I’m going to spank your little motherfucking ass if you do that to us again, we shouldn’t have to reboot our computers because you like to fuck around, so stop being a fucking idiot you little monkey. Fuck with your enemies, not with your friends. Stupid little motherfucking monkey. Just saying.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Going back together

"Gingko Viagra," Ever hear of that, its for old guys, its function is to help you remember what the fuck you are doing.

Like I said, I’ve been getting a little bit done to the little pickup camper. I’ve repaired the roof beams by sistering (old wooden boat days term) them with new pieces. Actually used wood because I recycle and reuse all I can. The picture isn’t very clear or helpful but after removing the rotten wood running the roof line I installed more, except for right at the top where there is a roll of staples, and rivets that I installed after removing the dumb ass rain gutter.

I often make my own glue and plastic wood filler but right now I’m just using Fix-It-All to fill in that gap because I have some here left over from a job when I was fixing someone’s home. I’ve install foam insulation where I removed the fiber insulation. Next I’ll install a heavy plastic vapor barrier.

To see how I make my own great glue and plastic wood look at this old postGlue and plastic wood

In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm, and three or more is a congress.--John Adams

Democracy never lasts long. It soon wastes, exhausts and murders itself. There was never a democracy that did not commit suicide. --John Adams

"Take it from me, wrinkle cream doesn't work. I've been using it for two years and my balls still look like raisins." --Harland Williams

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs….. BBC

Monday, March 31, 2008

Where to start

I don’t know, is she looking at his groin?

Two nuns are in a store grocery shopping and one grabs a six pack of beer. As they are checking out their items the clerk gives her a questioning look. She says, “I wash my hair with it.” The clerk hands her a hand full of pretzel sticks and she asks, “What are these for?” The clerk replies, “Hair curlers.” Get it? Ha, ha, ha.

Dan’l emailed me an interesting link yesterday so I’ll post it here. The monkeys can be very entertaining and amusing at times. Um, you ladies may not find it interesting seeing what some of your sisters do, this link is for the men. MONKEYS FIGHTING

Ever watched Married with Children? MARRIED WITH CHILDREN

In Zimbabwe, everyone's a millionaire, and they're still poor, very poor. I see that possibility happening to America, even England. Well, it’s not like we didn’t ask for it.

I’m getting Rick’s lawnmower fixed up pretty good, it’ll do a wheelie. *smirks* Fuck, sometimes I’m just as bad as the rest of the monkeys. Rick wanted me to put a bumper on it, but I just fixed the brake.

KAREN did a cute post for me yesterday, if you haven’t seen it yet get your monkey butt over and have a look. Like many others she doesn’t show all she is on her blogs, but she’s part Thelma and Louise on ‘Fried Green Tomato’s’. Ha, ha, ha.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC

Sunday, March 30, 2008

Stupid monkeys [Updated]

That cartoon is pretty much what the religious nuts god is like, all powerful my butt.

A teacher noticed that a little boy at the back of the class was squirming around, scratching his crotch, and not paying attention. She went back to find out what was going on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he had just recently been circumcised and he was quite itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the principal's office. He was to telephone his mother and ask her what he should do about it. He did and returned to his class.

Suddenly, there was a commotion at the back of the room. She went back to investigate only to find him sitting at his desk with his 'private part' hanging out. 'I thought I told you to call your mom!' she said. 'I did,' he said, 'And she told me that if I could stick it out till noon, she'd come and pick me up from school.

We got some sun here yesterday, so I let the little guy out so he could soak up some vitamin D for a while, all 2 ½ inches of him. It’s Sunday here at Polly’s Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse, lets look at some news.

WESTON, Wis. - Police are investigating an 11-year-old girl's death from an undiagnosed, treatable form of diabetes after her parents chose to pray for her rather than take her to a doctor.

I can see why a religious crackpot wouldn’t take her child to a monkey doctor, but depend on her god instead. But I guess her God was off fucking around somewhere else, ever notice that he does that a lot, like in the posted comic?

LOS ANGELES - A Texas woman who said she was forced to remove a nipple ring with pliers in order to board an airplane called Thursday for an apology by federal security agents and a civil rights investigation.

It appears that nipple rings can be difficult and painful to remove. Being always curious spirit is wondering if this woman has a mate, how do you kiss a nipple with a bar or ring through it? Wouldn’t that be irritating to the nipple? Being a long time nipple kisser I don’t get that. I’ll bet that little monkey isn’t getting any. They should have let her on the plane without having to remove them though.

'Earth Hour' to plunge millions into darkness…. SYDNEY (AFP) - Twenty-six major cities around the world are expected to turn off the lights on major landmarks, plunging millions of people into darkness to raise awareness about global warming, organizers said.

One crummy hour, big deal, that isn’t going to save the planet. So they turn off a bunch of lights for a bit to show their concern for the planet and then they build big polluting bonfires, has spirit ever mentioned that I’m surrounded by fuckin’ idiots? Spirit needs a frigging drink.

NEW YORK - U.S. stocks moved toward a higher open Friday as investors awaited a reading on February personal incomes and spending — figures that could reveal whether consumers are pulling back because of concerns about the economy.

TOKYO - Japan's inflation rate climbed at its fastest rate in a decade in February and the jobless rate worsened to 3.9 percent under data released Friday, raising concerns about the health of the world's second-largest economy.

Stock markets are just greed, plain old greed, and it grows until it tumbles and takes everyone down with it. It’s just a godfuckingdamnit big clusterfuck taking all of us down with it. Don’t get spirit started, you know how I get.

I have Rick’s riding lawnmower here to check out and service, in exchange for keeping it repaired I use it also. I hate mowing grass, I don’t have much, but Helen’s yard has a lot, but others think I should. But I don't water it or put fertilizer on it so I don’t have to mow it as often as others mow their lawns that they think are showpieces. Fuck their planet destroying lawns, and don’t get spirit started about golf courses, you know how I get.

When I went to get my free cable modem yesterday and was returning home – on a four lane highway – I was in the left lane – doing the speed limit – passing slower cars on the right when the monkey on my right decided to move into my lane – I had to hit my brakes and veer into the oncoming traffic lane to keep that monkey from hitting me. Stupid fucking monkeys – don’t pay enough attention to what they are doing – have no respect for others. In this state a lot of them don’t even have insurance.

Jimmy….. I did go to beer church for a bit yesterday, it was quite and sort of boring so I just had two beers and chatted with a few folks for a bit, ragged on Ralph for taking up two parking spots, then went to Rick’s shop because it’s more interesting there.

Cathy…. We don’t proof read spelling and grammar here, don’t worry about it, the English language is a piece of crap that the wordsmith monkeys keep screwing with anyway.

If a blog read like a book, and there was a lot of muttering and clutter removed from this one it would make a lot more sense. I should just write a book, but I won’t, the fucking monkeys wouldn’t understand it anyway.

Hey, have a great day, simply and peacefully, hugs…. BBC