(Remember, this is humor)
Two gay guys live together. The first guy said, "Let's play hide and seek. I'll hide, and if you find me I'll blow you." The second guy asked, "What if I can't find you?" The first replied, "I'll be behind the piano." ….
Q: What's the difference between a hunting dog and a fag?
A: A hunting dog sics ducks.
….
* The Top 12 Things Uttered by Yoda While Making Love *
12. "Ahhh! Yoda's little friend you seek!"
11. "Urm. Put a shield on my saber I must."
10. "Feel the force!"
9. "Foreplay, cuddling - a Jedi craves not these things."
8. "Down here, I am. Find a ladder, I must!"
7. "Do me or do me not - there is no try."
6. "Early must I rise. Leave now you must!"
5. "You know, this would be a lot more fun without Frank Oz's hand up my ass."
4. "Happens to every guy sometimes this does."
3. "When 900 years old you get, Viagra you need too, hmmmm?"
2. "Ow, ow, OW! On my ear you are!"
1. "Who's your Jedi master? WHO'S your Jedi Master?"
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Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down. A damn toilet seat isn’t what makes anyone considerate, if women are going to cry about that you will find them crying about all sorts of things, just dump them and find a better woman. (Guys, the solution to this is to just piss on the seat)
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Thank you for reading that. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping. (and you’re sleeping alone also) :-)
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War doesn't make boys men, it makes men dead. -Ken Gillespie
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That’s all.
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15 comments:
PEE
What ever.
Every toilet should have a pissoir like as natural as a bidé
Kirsten, I don't use a toilet to pee in. I made my own urinal. I just see that being talked about all the time. But I have never been with a woman that made an issue out of it. And I wouldn't want to be with a woman that did make an issue of it.
If you go into a public restroom you deal with the seat how it is. Deal with it that way at home also I say, instead of making an issue out of it.
Even if a person is trying to be considerate they can still forget. Just deal with it people, life is to short to fuss about that little stuff.
I thought that little cartoon I posted in comments pretty much explained it all.
Yes, you're right....
Sorry Hammer, I didn't think about that being a link. I thought it was just blue text correcting me for saying piss instead of pee. As if I should clean it up. :-)
you really need to get laid my friend...on to your next post
lol BBC I should have linked "golden shower"
"behind the piano"
Good one.
Az, thank you for your comment on my blog.
But I don't need to get laid, I can jack off for that. I need to make love, spiritual love.
It isn't going to happen, not in this lifetime. No one loves anyone that way anymore it seems.
Never mind, I can't expect anyone to understand what I'm saying.
Let me try to say that again. It is true that I would like some sex. But what I really need is love and sex together.
Ah, fuck it, no one knows what I'm saying anyway.
BBC: LOL ... We have come to wrong planet ... We have to try again...I at least know one thing...After this life I NEVER want to come back to this shitty planet, at least.
Just in case your readers dont know what kind of a Lunatic you really are I will show them the crap you leave on other people's blogs that surely dont ask for this nonsense from and old friggen Geezer!
BBC,
Fuck Jews, fuck Christians. You are all crazy. Get off my planet you stupid monkeys.
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Screw you, you crusty old pathetic fool!
I dont even think Viagra would help you at this point. But if you ever do decide to use it I hope you get an erection that last's for day's, have to go to the hospital, where they will insist you have no more use for that shriveled up old thing and decide you need to have it removed!
You old friggen geezer!
Shouldn’t you Christians be serving your God properly instead of wasting your time writing long posts here? Go do some good deeds and volunteer work or something. Hell, go do your Christmas shopping, it doesn’t matter that 30 thousand people die of starvation everyday so long as you can have your pretties.
Besides, I’ve already heard it all, so you are saying nothing new to me.
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Funny thing about you dolt's, you believe everyone who visit's a Christian blog is Christian. You made the mistake of believeing I am. Stupidass!
But just because someone believe's in something, you have to go and pick on it and screw it up for them. I bet you tortured and or screwed small animals as a child also. What you left behind at my friend's blog was uncalled for!! And you must go back and apologise for it.
You care about 30,000 people dieing of starvation? You go help them while you still have the time numbnuts!
I'm done with my shopping, so I have all the time in the world now to harass your pathetic ass until you go back and apologise!!!
Payback's a bitch isnt it?
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