Fuck it (Updated)

Vacation

It’s been at least nine years since I took a vacation, maybe longer. I’ve maybe taken only about six vacations in my whole life in fact. Hell, my live has been a series of interesting adventures and experiences so what would be the point in taking a vacation? And I’ve had some jobs that where so interesting (to me) that I never even thought of taking a vacation, just turned the time into cash if I could, and kept right on working. Yeah, some of you may find automotive front-end alignments boring but I sure didn’t, there is a real science to it if you do it right. And I was damn good at it, was well known in my area, and always booked with work even in the winter. People often waited two or three weeks for me to get to their car.
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I once spent a whole day and a half aligning a racecar for a friend (Lew Bell), for free. Because of the class he was running it had an old straight axle under it. One side needed positive camber and negative caster and the other side needed negative camber and positive caster. And the toe in on corners had to be correct also. Only one way you can do that on a straight axle properly, lots of bending with special tools and rams, very carefully, a little at a time, in the right places.
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He took it out the next week-end and set the track record with it, said it was the finest steering racecar that he had ever drove. It’s an art form to have wild caster and camber settings on a racecar (circle track) and still have it go straight on the straight always. Yup, I enjoyed my work.
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Anyway, for nine years I haven’t really needed a vacation, I’ve free lanced, worked for myself most of the time so had time off to goof around when I wanted it. And I had my 32 foot boat that I spent tons of time on. But now I do need a little time away, something different. Not much, just a little a few days.
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My requirements aren’t the same as many others that are trying to make themselves happy for a bit. I want to be warm, but I’m warm here. I want some peace and solitude and I don’t always get that here because I keep turning to the computer. I need something that is inexpensive as I don’t want to pay for a few days of enjoyment for a year or two, that takes much of the joy out of it. I don’t want to travel far because it’s too hard on the planet. I damn sure don’t want to spend a lot of time making plans, packing, dealing with airports and long flight times and such. Hell, I can visit any place I like on the Internet.
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Here is what I want, a warm place with an ocean view and a good book to read while I drink coffee or a beer in front of the window, a hot tub I can go to three times a day if I wish. So here is what I’m going to do. I don’t like it right on the waterfront where the Red Lyon is so I’ve booked a room for two days with the Quality Inn up the hill, I like to look down on my domains you might say. That’s right, I’ve booked a room right in this town. It’s a no brainer, not a lot of planning and stress and travel time and dealing with all that crap. A nice little vacation for less than two hundred bucks, I like that.
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I picked those days because there is a great band at the Eagles that week-end and I’m going dancing in the evenings. Eat your hearts out while you are paying for your expensive vacations suckers. I’ll get just as much enjoyment out of mine. Hugs.. BBC

12/7/2006
I used to keep a diary but I seldom put an entry in it anymore, this blog seems to have replaced it.
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Letters to Santa
Dear Santa, I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.
yer Frend, BiLLy
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Dear Billy, Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell! Santa
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Dear Santa, I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody! Love, Sarah
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Dear Sarah, Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they? Santa
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Dear Santa, I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do? Love, Teddy
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Dear Teddy, Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead. Santa
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Dear Santa, I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum kit, a pony and a tuba.
Love, Francis
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Dear Francis, Who names their kid "Francis" nowadays? I bet you're gay; I'll set you up with a Barbie.
Santa
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Dear Santa, I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door. Love, Susan
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Dear Susan, Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of scotch. Santa
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Dear Santa, What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?
Your friend, Thomas
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Dear Thomas, All the toys are made in China. I have a condo in Vegas, where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table. Hey, you wanted to know. Santa
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Dear Santa, Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?
Love, Jessica
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Dear Jessica,
Are you really that gullible or are you just a blonde? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house. Santa
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Dear Santa, I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one? Timmy
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Timmy,
That whiney begging shit may work with your folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again. Santa
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Dearest Santa, We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our home?
Love, Marky
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Mark,
First, stop calling yourself "Marky", that's why you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don't live in a house; you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does, through your bedroom window. Sweet Dreams, Santa
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[Update]... At last the asshats at blogger got a picture to post on my other blog I'm screwing with. And there is a story there, and you get to finish it. BBC
The spoiled brat

That link takes you to a page with the story and comments both on the same page, I think it will flow better that way, if anyone starts building the story anyway.

For a while this post is going to stay on top. I will edit it to put in some jokes, and change the picture on the right being as it’s the only fucking picture I can use and change right now.
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I even created another blog using a different template, and it is fucked up also. Some people seem to think that God rants in amusing ways so here we fucking go.

Dear Blog Spot & whoever it is there that keeps changing things and fucking up our experience for us.…. I have a message for you, FUCK YOU ASSHATS.
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We don’t want constant changes and to always be in a learning mode you fucking idiots. We just want to have blogs that we recognize and can use without a bunch of bullshit.
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Here is a news alert for you my friends….. WE DON’T FUCKING NEED YOU !!!! There are other blog severs on this planet you idiots. Keep fucking with us and I’m moving my blog. I’m sure of course that it would break your fucking hearts. Na, but as long as I can find a place to be happy I don’t fucking care how you feel because you are not showing any feeling for us when all you do is keep fucking with us.
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I want to use a blog, I want the fucker to look and work right without me spending hours fucking around with it. I don’t appreciate YOU fucking with MY time. …. Asshats. Fuck you.
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I’m checking out blog services that cost a little money but sometimes you get what you pay for. Ever since Google went on the stock market they just keep getting worse. I don’t like the fucking stock market and I’m not liking Google anymore. If they had paid blog accounts I wouldn’t get one because they would just keep fucking with it while trying to get rich on the stock market. I don’t know what their fucking game is, but I’m fucking tired of playing it.
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Fuck everything.
Fuck blogger for fucking up my experience and what I want to do with my blog.
Fuck the warmongers.
Fuck stupid human monkeys.
Fuck large organized religions.
Fuck Christians
Fuck Muslims
Fuck Jews
Fuck you asshats causing so many problems and keeping world peace away.
Minor religions are the only peaceful ones.

Frankly, I'm tired of the whole fucking web experience. And the whole human experience. Blogger just keeps changing things and I'm tired of having to learn different ways, it isn't bringing world peace, it isn't touchy feely. Screw it, I'm going to go touch someone, in person.