Bubba died in a fire and was burned pretty badly. The mortician needed someone to identify the body, so he called for Bubba's two best friends, Earl and Gomer. Earl went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Earl looked and said. "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over." So the mortician rolled him over and Daryl looked and said. "Nope, ain't Bubba."The mortician thought that was rather strange and he was pretty sure of the body's identity. Gomer was then brought in to identify the body. Gomer took a look at him and said, "Yup he's burnt real bad, roll him over." The mortician rolled him over and Gomer looked down and said, "Nope. Ain't Bubba."
The mortician asked, "How can you tell?" Gomer said, "Well, Bubba had two assholes." "What? He had two assholes?" asked the mortician. "Yup, everyone knew about it, too. Every time we went to town, folks would say, 'Here comes Bubba with them two assholes.'"
Ha, ha, ha…. Jeanne sent me that.
From a complex mind that shares with others all that is in it.
What I posted about sex yesterday, I don’t recall that I was ever interested in a quickie, don’t think I ever asked for one. A few times the rocket went off faster than expected, but it wasn’t intentional.
MORE FREE STUFF !! Yesterday I brought home about 35 feet of six foot high cedar fencing. In panels five to six feet long so it will make a fast to put up fence. It’s solid, no spacing between the boards so I’m going to use it to extend my storage area. I’ve now got posts, walls, just need the roof to show up.
Power corrupts. Absolute power is kind of neat."
My dad, while an educated man, was not a good speller. He once told me that if you only know one way to spell a word, you are not very creative.
I've got one that helps me live a happier life: “Should haves" don't count.
The greater part of our happiness depends on our dispositions and not on our circumstances.
As I said, I don’t go to churches, but I did go to the UU Fellowship yesterday as the speaker sounded interesting. You missed a good talk. About how powerful segments of the far right are fighting to take control of this country and make it an all Christian country, and make the government all male Christian men, no women in government. Like I keep saying, I’m surrounded by frigging idiots. I think it’s the last stand of a dying Christian right, I sure as hell hope it is. I’m sick and tired of those fools.
And I went up and spoke about the Friday night Friendship dinners each week at the Methodist church. Long time readers of this blog know that I was the crew leader and cooked the dinners when it was the Fellowships turn to do them. I stopped doing them a while back because a man kept coming into the church kitchen and telling me what and how to do things. It pisses God off when others try to boss him around. My leaving left the other UU members very unhappy as the dinners were a real mess after that. They have talked me into returning and doing them for the rest of the year and I got an assurance from the man that was irritating me that he wouldn’t be there, so everyone is happy again. And blah, blah, and fucking blah. *smirks*
All in all, Universal Universalist Unitarians are pretty easy going and laid back people and I enjoy the Fellowship. But I am not one of them (I have never been a UU member) being as at times I’m a cranky opinioned fart that thinks everyone is entitled to my opinions and if they don’t agree with me they are wrong. LOL …. I didn’t go for about six months and then went back a few weeks ago to listen to ‘Bear who talks too much’ as I was interested in his views. After the program a number of folks came to me and told me how much they had missed me. WTF?
More heavy stuff on my other blog today. My other blog
Hey, have a great day, hugs…. BBC
19 comments:
No comments yet? I guess I just leave some people tongue tied. LOL
Hey you thanks for leaving such a sweet comment. People may think your cranky but I know your a good person with a heart of gold and yes unfortunetly I live in a sky high box. Funny if we lived anywhere else I could afford a nice house but the men iin my life like NY. I didn't know you could cook, the dinner sounds like fun. Have a great day!!!
Hugs
Sure I can cook, cooked in a cafe for a while a few years ago, I cook all my meals, and I cook all of Helen's meals and take them to her house for her.
If I lived with a working woman I would be a good little house hubby. Right now I'm doing the laundry here at Polly's Honky Tonk Saloon and Whorehouse. :-)
Polly's sounds fun. Don't do anything I wouldn't do
Just FYI
Leandra is a professional writer.
lol!
After the bubba tale
just couldn't read the rest
Hi Sewmouse.... I'm a professional idiot. :-)Hugs.
And Leandra lives too far away, I'd prefer someone that lives here and can spend lots of time looking in my computer. It's my alternate brain you know. Actually, a lot better brain than the one in this little monkey head.
If you like to play God, then answer this question please:
Pretend it's like 6,000-7,000 years ago and you are God. You have all these human apelike creatures on earth that want to continuously ask where they came from. How will you explain to them how they came to be and how the earth came to be? Understand now that these are people with very, very limited understanding so they can't really grasp the concept of millions of years and carbon dating and such. They understand days and seasons maybe. What would you tell them?
Paul F..... That it was a miracle, and nothing more. A once in a cosmos miracle by the way.
I've noticed over the past few weeks, that you don't refer to us humans as monkeys, nearly as much. And as always, I'm nosy! Would that be because:
A)We've finally evolved past the monkey stage:
B)We've sank to a level below the monkey's and you're too kind hearted to point it out, or:
C)The monkey's got damn tired of being slandered, and sued your ass!
An anxious world awaits.....:)
I don't think they would understand that really. I think they would need a story, like a story that you would tell children. Wouldn't you say?
TFWY... LOL... Don't worry, like you I bounce all over the chart, we don't do labels. I try to make humans more evolved but I'll get back to the fucking monkeys, after all, I'm a fucking monkey in evolution.
You're deep man, I like that. :-)
Paul, you may have a point, I will have to think about that.
If I were God (and I might be) I'd wait till humans evolved and knew science before I revealed myself. I'd tell them over the internet and sattelite TV. Then I'd offer them evidence of my existence by telling them that 10 world leaders would spontaneously combust (you know like that bush Moses spoke to) at a specific time and date. The 4th of July would be a great time for that.
Cook eh? How's about sharing some recipes...or...tell us some of the stuff you used to cook...or are now again cooking for those folks.
lol Melissa, I like that
10 World leaders to spontaneously combust like the burning of bush, on the 4th of July
I think alqaida has been trying to play the hand of god on that one.
But the burning Bush has bigger missiles, a larger military & better equipped airforce, and a secret weapon called tricky dickie.
Knocking a few satellites out of orbit, crashing telecoms and the Internet with a pulse, should have a dramatic effect. Mind you most people would be in too much of a panic to listen to any god ... and having no internet or tv would drive some positively (or is it negatively) insane - out of their minds.
If a being has evolved to the point where it is questioning its own origins of species, then that being is sophisticated enough to handle the concept of "babies come from fucking" - and "Babies look like their parents" - and the evolution of appearances.
Probably able to understand hybrids and crossbreeding as well, just from observing nature.
So why tell a big LIE, if you are "god"? Why tell a huge, ugly lie to your "chosen people" when the truth is more elegant, more intelligent and less likely to cause misogynist attitudes and crap?
If I were this imaginary, invisible "god" and my ape-like creatures were asking where they came from, I'd tell them the truth - see that ape? You and he have a common ancestor - but some time back there was a mutation and his line became more in-tune with the natural society and less dependant on cleverness, and your line became more dependant on your cleverness and brainpower and less in-tune with natural cycles. Just like when Og's sister married that dark-haired fellow from the other tribe and now all their children have dark hair.
Really not all that fucking hard of a concept. Why anyone insists they have to believe in some hateful "god" who plays tricks on them (garden of eden), sets unreasonable expectations (most of leviticus), despises at least 1/2 of its own creation (misogyny runs RAMPANT thru the entire "bible" - from the myth of "eve" to the myths of "jesus")...
Really - you would think a religion that creates its god in its own image would be a bit less harsh on its followers.
Now that was an excellent answer sewmouse....
I think I wanted to answer paul f the same way, but lacked the proper wording.
Hell, I probably didn't even have the proper answer, but you seemed to have said it right.
But still, all in all, your answers lack logic. How can you tell an apelike human, with the understanding of a four year old, about mutation? How will you tell them where the sun came from? You all know what I'm getting at, but, you are human, and therefore, your thinking is quite fallible and your understand, even now, is quite limited. That's because you all fall into the realm of average to less-than-average intelligence. It's a big bell curve when it comes to intelligence, and most of you are right smack in the middle of the bell. So, in reality, I didn't expect that anybody would givea logical or even a feasible answer. I was just proving a point. Friggin' nitwits.
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